蒼穹，翽羽

    Somehow, the idea of dying and solitude, or the combination of them - solitary death, keeps haunting me recent days. I keep having the image of myself, dead, alone and quiet. It's awful that I've got nobody here who I can really let myself out, to erase the image. Nobody. Thus, I stay prisoned and poisoned with loneliness. Windows shut one after another, I guess soon there won't be any more light. Trying to open those windows made me appear as a fool. Foolishly, desperately, trying to escape from being caught by the blue mood. To make matters worse, the more beautiful the days and nights are, the harder for me to get rid of my loneliness. Life goes on in a muted way, and the rolling life around moved on without me. It seems to make no difference. Perhaps, there will not be many more days ahead anyway. Perhaps, what I really want to say is that I am lost in my need. Therefore, as a drawning man, I am looking for straws around. I've lose the ability to tell what I want to tell for there is no one to tell anyway. In the end, I don't even know what I want to tell. And it sucks to be sank with such emptiness.